Monday, 29 November 2010

An apology

This afternoon my brother in law rang Vixen, telling her in very direct terms about my right to privacy, her wrong-doing in her unauthorised removal, in my absence, of documents which were not hers, the possibility of the police being called, and various other matters relating to the marriage between her father and me. He strongly suggested she return the documents, apologise to me and undertake to reform her ways. It sounds as though he gave her a big fright: he said she blustered and was very defensive at first, but was obliged to change her tune.

He rang to let me know to expect a call, and shortly after she did ring and apologise, undertook not to visit without notice, and to return the documents. We had a discussion, and I told her that she should have asked me instead of helping herself in my absence, and that her father could remember nothing about what she wanted when she visited.  She acknowledged that she had been wrong, and that her father's memory is extremely poor. I asked what her reaction would be should she discover I had been in HER house without her knowledge or permission, and had removed documents. We discussed her sister's forthcoming visit, and I specified that she should visit for short periods only, as Dr P otherwise becomes both tired and confused. And I said I would NOT be going away during the visit. I accepted her apology and said I would do my best to put all this behind me. She said that she and her sisters all appreciated my care of their father, and that if I were not there, the burden of care would fall on them. However she then swung onto the attack, telling me how dreadful she thinks the bathroom and shower recess is, and that we need a whole new bathroom. (I am not sure how I could keep Dr P washed while such work was being done.)

She arrived late in the afternoon, rang to say she had arrived, returned the documents and talked briefly to her father and me. Naturally we did not mention the war. There is no point: he should not have this burden or be put in a position of having to take one side or the other. He would not cope, and it is extremely difficult for any parent to have a child criticised or attacked. Hear no evil, see no evil....

She has not said why she wanted the documents, or why she failed to discuss it with me, so I still think she is Up to Something, which very likely involves her sister.

My brother in law intends to write her a follow up letter, which he thinks will put even more fear of God into her. I hope so. I will remain on guard.

He is very good value, my brother in law, and is able to be clear, concise, direct and forthright, not to mention being an excellent lawyer, and a decent and honourable person. He can call a spade a bloody shovel, and does not pussyfoot around. He remains ever calm and civil. I owe him a lot. His wife, my sister, told me she has been dreaming of giving Vixen a piece of her mind!

I am calmer now, although my mind is still churning and heaving,  and am so glad that this action has been taken. Even if I do fall apart and feel like an absolute sook, a soggy mass, and a scaredy cat. At least something has been achieved. But what will the future hold?

Tidying up the study and chucking stuff out is good therapy, and shortly I will be ringing people to come and take it all away.

6 comments:

ChrisB said...

Oh good on your brother in law, he sounds wonderful and certainly seems to have frightened her. What a horrible person she sounds, I hope that is the end of it and that she has learned her lesson. How typical of her though to have a dig about the bathroom, she couldn't just apologise with grace and leave the matter there could she. Anyway, try and rise above all this and remember there are lots of good and kind people around - your B in L to name one!!
Take care - big hug x

The Image Is Everything said...

Oh go Uncle B!!!!!!!!! Fantastic stuff! Delighted! V. V. V. good. Hope you're feeling somewhat better. Sounds to me as though you handled the phone call really well, and what a stroke of genius to involve Uncle B and make it formal. Well done both of you! Would love to be there if and when Aunt C gives her the said piece of her mind!!!!

saffronlie said...

Hurrah! A good result, it seems, even if there are some lingering doubts or questions. Well played.

Isabelle said...

Oh dear, poor Persiflage. I hope things improve still more.

Stomper Girl said...

Hurrah! And I don't think that my aunt is the only one who'd like to give those girls a piece of their mind...

Relatively Retiring said...

This sounds a positive step for all concerned. Well done!