Why are fire engines red?

Perhaps as the season changes and we have to re-accustom ourselves to hot weather, even at night, I notice things which suddenly become easy to complain about.

I have encountered here and there a few blogs, such is this - an enjoyable piece of vituperation - discussing some of the really stupid names unfortunate and innocent babies are given. Not their faults, poor little lambs. Having noticed names such as Natarsha, Symantha, and Giaan (how the heck are you supposed to pronounce that?) I went on line and checked some birth notices, and in one fell swoop discovered Laycie, Haylee, Aspen, and Trinity Starr (!) the sister of a little boy named Indiana. I am so sick of surnames being used as first/given/Christian names such as Harrison or Mackenzie. And as for the names Sarah Palin gave her kids!!!

Does no one teach children that there are some rules of English pronunciation? Such as the effect of a double consonant? Yes, I know English is supposed to be a difficult and inconsistent language, but it really is not as bad as it is often made out to be.

OK, enough already. I am now about to destroy any credibility I might have as a rational being.

Some evenings I amuse myself by watching some really bad television. And guess what, it is usually American. We have Foxtel, and one of the channels is called Home and Health. This afternoon I watched half of a programme called Yes to the Dress. In this, bridal consultants take brides to a wedding dress place and urge stupid females into totally unbecoming dresses. I cannot believe how dreadful they look as they fantasise about walking up the aisle swathed in a rigid strapless dress with a tight waist ballooning into massive skirts and trains.

There is another programme which gets overweight brides-to-be into training so that they can lose enough weight to fit into one of these horrid monstrosities. Can anyone explain why people imagine that strapless dresses are becoming?

Then there are parenting and children series such as Jon and Kate Plus Eight, and Seventeen Kids and Still Counting. I read the other day that Jon and Kate's marriage is on the rocks. Certainly the bits I watched today indicated that neither is enjoying dealing with eight little kiddies all that much, and that their survival technique is to adopt a very military approach.

The seventeen children one is sanctimonious in the extreme, so I will skip that in future. The names all start with J, and there is a Jinger. I wonder what the 18th baby will be called? But I did gather that to make ends meet they rent out quite a few investment properties, and that they own nine vehicles. And their accommodation is not to be sneezed at. And quite likely the income from the TV stations helps buy the odd crust.

Other series on offer are Who'll Age Worst, Plastic Surgery Before and After, Rich Bride, Poor Bride, Perfect Housewife, and Downsize me.

Tomorrow night I might watch Why my baby won't sleep. Should be fun.

I will confess to enjoying Supernanny, but I don't see it very often, as Dr P tends to arrive downstairs, and immediately starts jeering at me. I take no notice, as he watches his own junk, such as Two and a Half Men, which makes me leave the room immediately.

It is quite satisfying to watch programmes which confirm one's prejudices. But seriously, this channel focuses on extremes, and preys on female uncertainties about their bodies and beauty, and appears to put a relentless pressure on women to see the world in such terms.