Every time I start thinking I can cope and that they will all be gone in a few days, something happens that socks me in the eye. I had, foolishly, thought that Dr P's daughters would have been satisfied with the money they'd got only a few days ago.
But wait! There was more. Money to gain, that is.
After the last very large transfer of money from him to them, lo and behold, they have done it again. Yesterday's little effort removed three quarters of the remainder of his cash assets. They have helped themselves to 90 per cent of it in all. Cheque butts neatly filled in by the WSD. This took place while I was out of the house doing the food shopping.
Don't they ever think that he might need to have ready access to cash, if he needs, as he surely will, to move into a nursing home?
I was so outraged when I discovered this latest raid that I remonstrated vigorously that it was unconscionable and reprehensible of his daughters to demand and take this money, but all I got was a mumbled response about his evening up what he had given initially to one daughter as a loan, which was to have been deducted from her share of the inheritance. And then further comments that I was jealous, grasping, and wanted his money for myself. He was very abusive to me.
They MUST realise that he is incapable of handling his affairs rationally! Surely they are using that very fact. These women, all with high incomes and amounts of property, have been here day after day, while he has asked them time and time again, with only a few moments between his questions, where they work, where they live, what they do, who are their children and how old are they, while haring him ask me has he had his daily medicine, minutes after he has swallowed it. And then presumably they would claim that he has the capacity to manage his affairs. Well, a mere 6 months ago he would not have given away all this money. They, of course, are all returning to their various foreign countries and of course do nothing for him of practical use. Bloodsuckers, they are.
Dr P does not have an appointment with a geriatrician until late March, and the Guardianship Tribunal will not act without a medical report.
This morning after his shower he could not walk unaided back to the bedroom and it took all my efforts and strength to get him the several metres from the bathroom to the bed. It was all I could do to keep him upright. My mind raced ahead to the possibility of admission to a nursing home sooner rather than later, and how it could all be arranged. He has recovered somewhat. Who knows how he will be tomorrow and in the future?
The WSD and family leave tomorrow, all missions accomplished. Thanks Dad!
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5 comments:
That is truly disgusting behaviour, and I am appalled that a child would ever treat their parent in such a way. I'm thinking now of legal matters, and if he truly is unable to manage his affairs, then it might be time to sign Power of Attorney papers, naturally making sure that you have that power and none of his daughters do. Of course, your solicitor will know much more than me about such things.
I am very sorry that not only do you have to sort through this mess, but that Dr P cannot realise what his daughters are up to and has turned on you. What a terrible way to end the year.
It sounds like such a difficult time for you, Persiflage. I can only offer you my best wishes and hope that these impossibilities pass soon.
Oh Jesus!!!! Bitches! Phone them up and tell THEM they have to put him into a nursing home, and that it will be at THEIR expense, seeing as they have conveniently made off with his cash. I will try to call today, sorry not to get back to you yesterday, Stu told me you'd called when I was out photographing the yearling. love youxxxx
I am absolutely appalled also. I don't know how you can stand it. What a way to treat their father as well as you, who are caring for him. Who do they think would look after him if you weren't there?
In Britain, you're not allowed to give away your assets - this is regarded as avoidance of inheritance tax and unless you live another 7 years (or something - not a lawyer, don't really know) then ... well, not quite sure what. But I think it's time to consult a lawyer.
How awful. I do feel for you.
abuse and/or theft by a person in a position of trust (i.e. - an adult daughter - or four - who should know better, and in knowing better, should DO better) is a crime here - are there things such as Durable Power of Attorney in Oz(?)
rationality and reasoning ... we are having similar difficulties with the person my mother has become - she, too, continues to lose her grasp on reality - one thing that seems to help her is writing it all down and having her check it off - lunch at 11:30 (check), meds at 4:00 (check) ... i gave her a big digital clock that has the month/day/year/day-of-the-week so she can SEE what day it is ... my understanding is that reading is over-learned and, as a result, remembered ... and reassuring ... and might bring you a bit of peace
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