Amazing deficiencies in retail world

Taking advantage of having to go to the city recently for a physiotherapy appointment, I did some shopping. Before proceeding to the all-important task of buying my granddaughter a birthday present, I did the rounds of the cosmetics counters. All I want is a purple lipstick. A really truly PURPLE lipstick!

Some years ago my needs for purple lipsticks were easily met. I had an expensive one and an el cheapo, artistically named Number 11, which cost about $3.00. The expensive one was discontinued, and the replacements did not look as good. The el cheapo continued to be available, but it was not sold at most pharmacies. Periodically I’d find a pharmacy which stocked the brand and the colour, and would replenish my supplies. The price increased to $5.00. A bargain!

And then disaster struck. Number 11 is still sold, BUT they have changed the colour into a not very interesting pinky mauve.

Never mind, I eventually thought, I will see if I can contact them on line, since I could not find them in the telephone directory. No luck there either. I am reduced to a stub of one lipstick, and about half a lipstick on another, and I do not know how I will cope when they are all used up.

In the course of my quest I have sampled quite a few related shades and colours, and alas, none is quite right. I have bought more el cheapo brands, and have had to discard most of them.

On the way to the children’s wear department, I weaved my way through all the cosmetics counters, seeking help, which turned out not to be helpful. I braved both expensive cosmetics brands and the cheaper, although not necessarily inferior varieties. Nothing. Niente, nada, nulla. There are reddy-purples, pinky purples, browny purples, mauvy purples, bleached looking mauves, but a good clear purple, midway between blue and red – not even a hint. Total cosmic void, total failure.

You would think that at least one firm could include such a colour, given that there are often between twenty and fifty possible shades and colours from which to choose. Where is the justice in this world? How does it happen that such simple feminine needs are excluded from the universe? Evidently purple is not for everyone. BUT IT SHOULD BE! Given that purple is very fashionable at present, the lack of matching lipsticks is both strange and sinister. It smacks of conspiracy.

I blame the colour-blind men who run cosmetics companies.

Here is my collection of failed purchases of lipsticks which are just not right. My perfect purple one is in the middle.

This photo should demonstrate the need for a real purple lipstick.

I made my way to the children’s wear department to find the birthday present. Finally, it seemed that success had crowned my efforts in the birthday present department. Pink was not the predominant colour. There was choice! I sent my granddaughter velour pants and a hooded top, in a most glorious shade of blue, and a purple long-sleeved top. But even here, things went a trifle wrong. Her mother had already bought her the exact same blue velour outfit, so the one I sent needed to be exchanged. Alas and woe.

I used to think I was a good shopper.

However, I did come home yesterday with a very fetching light purple woollen jumper, which went some way towards soothing my bruised and battered psyche. But the problem with the lipstick remains unresolved.